The 5 Love Languages for Business

Let’s talk about team connection. If you don’t feel connected to your team, or they don’t feel connected to each other, it will trickle down and eventually affect every aspect of your business. 

However, instead of signing them up for another team-building seminar or introducing a new communication policy, you can always try learning into their love languages. 

Yes, you heard me right. I want you to use love languages to bring your team closer to each other- and, as a result, closer to you. 

What is a Love Language?

In 1992, Gary Chapman released a book called The Five Love Languages that outlined five different ways people experienced love and how to use those “languages” to strengthen relationships. 

According to Chapman: “Different people with different personalities give and receive love in different ways. By learning to recognize these preferences in yourself and in your loved ones, you can learn to identify the root of your conflicts, connect more profoundly, and truly begin to grow closer.”

Sounds good, right? Now, imagine bringing your team together like never before.

All you have to do is learn their love languages. 

The Five Love Languages for Business

Acts of Service

Acts of service are when others feel love through action. 

If you have a team member whose love language is acts of service, you could help with a difficult task, give them a new process or tool to streamline their job or remind them that you have their back no matter what. 

What you don’t want to do is promise something and fail to follow through. It’s not good in a normal situation, but those with acts of service language will feel it more deeply- and remember it. 

Receiving Gifts

Most people like gifts, but those who use it as a love language feel extra special when they know you’re thinking about them. 

If you have a team member whose love language is receiving gifts, occasionally send them a gift card to show them your appreciation. It doesn’t have to be large, either- just enough for lunch or a cup of coffee- and they’ll soon feel the love. 

What you don’t want to do is forget special occasions (birthdays, work anniversaries, etc.). Otherwise, they may feel slighted or unappreciated. 

Quality Time

Quality time is when you spend time with and focus on the other person- even if they’re online. 

If you have a team member whose love language is quality time, set a time every couple of weeks to check in with them, see how they’re doing, and give them your full, undivided attention.  

What you don’t want to do is seem distracted or anxious to leave while with them. If you act like you have better things to do when you’re with them, they’ll never grow to trust or rely on you. 

Words of Affirmation

Everyone needs a little encouragement, but some people thrive on it. 

If you have a team member whose love language is words of affirmation, try to encourage, praise, support, and appreciate them verbally whenever you can (if they deserve it). You could send them a quick message praising them for their latest achievement, sing their praises at the next meeting, or message them a quick “good job” in the group chat. These small things will mean the world to them.

What you don’t want to do is fail to recognize their efforts or contributions. That will lower morale and prompt the team members to stop doing more than the bare minimum. 

Physical Touch 

Physical touch can be tricky when working virtually, but there are ways to make them feel loved without physically being there. 

If you have a team member whose love language is physical touch, you can always use phrases like “giving you a high-five” or “sending you a hug” to help them feel loved. Or, if you’re on a video call, high-five the camera for extra oomph. It’s not the same, but they’ll get the message. 

What you don’t want to do is feign abuse (punching or hitting) or ignore them completely. Yes, it’s more complicated than the others when virtual, but showering love on everyone except the ones with physical touch will become noticeable. 

What’s YOUR Love Language?

Now that you know the five love languages and know how to use them, it’s time to add yourself to the mix. 

For example, if your love language is acts of service, a team member finishing their tasks will feed directly into that. Or, if you enjoy words of affirmation, someone praising your leadership style will make you feel like a million bucks. Alternately, if your love language is words of affirmation but your team doesn’t communicate, it can be frustrating. 

If everyone leans into the love languages of those around them, your team will become ten times happier and more productive. And don’t keep it to yourself, either. Bring up the idea of love languages at the next team meeting and see how they respond. If they don’t know their love language, ask them for a best guess or to take the quiz. Then, you can all work together for a brighter future. 

Final Thoughts

In the online and virtual world, the most commonly used love language is words of affirmation. However, it’s also the easiest one to do, and you’ll be surprised at how much harder your team of A-players will work when they feel appreciated and loved. 

So, figure out their love languages, set reminders on your calendar for gifts and quality time (if needed), and show your team that you care.